What’s the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.
What’s the difference between Big Foot and intelligent man?
Big Foot’s been spotted a several times.
What’s the smartest thing a man can say?
“My wife says…”
Why can’t men get mad cow disease?
Because they’re all pigs.
Why do men like smart women?
Why do men name their penises?
Because they don’t like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their decisions.
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Why do men whistle when they’re sitting on the toilet?
Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.