1.An Irish lass, a customer: ‘Could I be trying on that dress in the window?’
Shopkeeper: ‘I’d prefer that you use the dressing room.’
2.Mrs. Feeney shouted from the kitchen, ‘Is that you I hear spittin’ in the vase on the mantel piece?’
‘No,’ said himself, ‘but I’m gettin’ closer all the time.’
3.’O’Halloran,’ asked the pharmacist, ‘did that mudpack I gave you improve your wife’s appearance?’
‘It did surely,’ replied O’Halloran, ‘but it keeps fallin’ off.’
4.Paddy and Seamus have just opened a new restaurant on the moon. It serves great cheese dishes, but the atmosphere is terrible.
5.How can you tell when an American moon is going broke? You can see that the moon is down to its last quarter.