Puns of fun

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.

After an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.

“But why?” they asked, as they moved off.

“Because,” he said, “I can’t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.”

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PUNS FOR EDUCATED MINDS

The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Circumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
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I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
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She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
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A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
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No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
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Puns, one liners.

A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said: ‘Keep off the Grass.’

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The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

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The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

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A backward poet writes inverse.

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In a democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes

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When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

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